Leading with kindness
Leadership is a topic; I have often avoided talking about publicly. I feel people have strong opinions of it, and do not get me wrong, I do too. Usually, I notice people posting about the attributes a leader should have, how they should lead their team, the narratives they should be saying. Yet, beyond the commentary, I sometimes find it hard to picture this in practice.
Over the years, I’ve often been told, that I cannot be a leader. The reason being I’m too nice, or too soft. That I don’t have it in me to stand my ground and fight back. I whole heartedly disagree for those being reasons as to why I could not be a leader. Let me lay out my perspective for you.
I think there is a place to be aggressive (for a lack of other words) but I do not think it needs to be the whole characteristic of being a leader. For me, I want to be approachable. I have knowledge to share, and things I want to learn. I want to help talent grow in this industry. I want a thriving events industry and forget that COVID ever existed. Ambitious, I know.
Events is already a stressful industry to begin with, add to that aggressiveness or authoritarian behaviour and a know-it-all approach, it just makes things worse. It’s also not about playing favourites and using events as a bait for performance or giving them to your favourite employees or colleagues. It’s an opportunity to give your team the experiences that will help them grow. Give them opportunities that forces them to be outside of their comfort zone, and stand by them as they take that leap of faith. It is taking accountability for when you’ve made a mistake and celebrating the success of the team in delivering an event. If believing and aiming for these characteristics means I’m not fit to be a leader, then I’m fine with that. I will find other avenues to develop these skills.
An example is that I love participating in mentorship programmes. I signed up with the New Zealand Events Association a few years ago. The first year I participated as a mentor and a mentee, and then as a mentor two more times. There is so much knowledge sharing that’s available, and instances where you can learn from others. In my day-to-day life, I like making myself available for teammates who want to learn more about processes or learn about what they can or cannot do in the industry. I’m nowhere near an expert on this, and do not claim to be, but if having a conversation with me helps someone else, I will make that time available.
People claim that leaders should know it all. But the world is evolving so rapidly, that there is no way anyone can keep up. There is strength in saying that you don’t have all of the answers but will work on finding out the best solutions.
Maybe I’m strongly opinionated on the topic, maybe I’m naïve, but this is maybe the only time I will outwardly talk about leadership.
Until next time,
Mili
